Re: ‘Til Death Do Us Part?
Once Upon A Time I was married. It seems like a lifetime ago. I won’t go into too much detail today, but you can’t truly know me without reading that chapter of my story.
(This would be a perfect place to insert a picture of the blushing bride on her wedding day. However, she threw the wedding album in the fire when her marriage exploded)
Little girls plan their lives long before they’re old enough to make decisions for themselves. From the time we’re little we dream of wedding gowns with long veils. (Anybody out there hang a pillow case on the back of your head in front of the bedroom mirror? Just me?)
I shared a room with Ken and Barbie. I remember hiding behind a chair with my cousin so we could make our dolls kiss and our moms wouldn’t see. When I was in elementary school, we played the “kissing game.” Run through the monkey bar poles, and if you bump into a boy, you kiss him on the cheek. (You can’t make this stuff up).
I got my first “will you go with me” note in fifth grade. Remember those? You had to answer yes or no by checking the appropriate box. I checked yes, but we never went anywhere!
I’ve since learned that love + life are not that simple. Men and women are not perfect plastic Ken and Barbie dolls. Marriage and relationships are far more complicated than checking a “yes” box.
Scott (my ex) was my cousin’s baseball coach. I should have known better than to go on a blind date. I fell in love fast and never looked back. Three months later we were engaged.
Life Lesson #1: Take your time in getting to know a person. Three months is not long enough. There is no such thing as love at first sight.
His parents + sister made me part of their family and life was good for ten years.
I believed that.
If you’ve ever seen a Lifetime movie, you’ve seen my marriage. The husband has another life and the wife is always the last to know.
When I envisioned my life, this is definitely not what it looked like. Divorce never entered my mind.
Life Lesson #2: Sometimes we have to let go of the picture of what we thought life would be like, and find joy in the story we’re actually living.
Time does heal all wounds. Even the really deep ones.
Scott and I aren’t BFF’s, but we get along for JP. On the other hand, his family and I have remained close. They are so good to us and I thank God for their friendship.
I was happily married, but I’m definitely not unhappy now. Far from it. There are so many reasons I’m satisfied with being single. We’ll touch on those another time.
Life Lesson #3: Sometimes good things come to an end to make room for better things!
As traumatic as the ending was, I would star in the movie all over again to walk off set with JP.
We are blessed.